New Mom Realities: Stuff I Had No Clue Bout’
1. Like seriously, people are very kind in desiring to love and care for your child through the art of babysitting. However though, you have to know what you want and need for the proper care of your little one. Some of those little intricate details you kinda don’t realize until something occurs and you’re like wow I should tell them I don’t like that.
One of the interesting things I’ve noticed is that there are people who believe they can raise your children better than you. Even if they mean well, I don’t like it. One moment it can be the thought that I don’t give my son the right food or the right drink or too much of it. Another moment it’s that I need to discipline him more or not allow him to do x,y,z.
Here’s the thing: I am his mother.
When I say that, every ounce of blood in my body is ignited with the passion of motherhood and “momma-bearness”. I am his mother. I carried him close to my heart for 9 months, he was given to my husband and I to shepherd through this life, I labored for 18 hours, and I pushed that brown baby boy OUT. I am his mother. Anyone who lovingly would like to care for him while his parents go out or take a break…we are so grateful. However, we are his parents.
I am his mom. I’ve learned in the almost 10 months of his life that I have to be very clear about how we would like our boy to be cared for and if we haven’t given the ok for something, how to go about getting the ok. Otherwise, we will not feel comfortable leaving him with someone we believe will treat him differently when we are not around because they think they know what’s best for our child.
It is such a learning experience and I am thankful to be a part of this journey.
2. Church life is different. Mannnnnn I come to church and listen to the sermon from the lobby because my baby boy is too turnt up for the mommy room and the auditorium! Lol he enjoys crawling and screaming and having the time of his life as our lobby is huge and carpeted with space to play and be jolly. I don’t blame him tho, I would too if I didn’t have to be a responsible grown up lol
Seriously tho, I am learning so much from this new arrangement. The lobby is a place where wonder happens. It’s the place where people come in and you have the opportunity to show hospitality at the moment they enter. It’s where people go to sit when the music is too loud and where people go who need a change of environment where they can usually listen better. It’s where moms go with their strollers and their coffee and where teenagers sit when they don’t wanna be at church with their parents. It’s where you can eat snacks galore because there are trash cans and freedom to eat eat eat!
In other words, it’s an amazing place to have unlikely conversations, make new friends with many people who are searching for community, talk to new moms and get tips and be exhausted together. Meet new couples and new members. Talk to the security guys or the people who serve every Sunday at the front desk. Soo many people in different spots in life. So many awkward folks who just need love from folks who won’t treat them like they’re weird.
So what I learned is this: when it’s time for me to hit the lobby on a Sunday, I make myself open and available. As scary as that can be because I’d rather not talk and just be reserved. But now I make myself available and seek to reach out to at least one person I don’t know well. Sometimes saying hello is all a person needs. Or asking them how their day is going and really listening. Complimenting their choice of scarf or commenting on their smile.
The lobby is where the no-pressure ministry happens.
And there’s more where that came from.